who am i?

Where do you even start to describe who you are? What does it even mean?
I could say I'm 5'10" with long brown hair and dark brown eyes, but that doesn't matter on the internet.
I could say I'm 21 years old and have lived most of my life in Champaign, IL. I'm a senior at the University of Illinois, studying harp performance. That's gets at the question a little better, but still doesn't say much.
Right now I'm rocking out to Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Sweet Home Alabama" and writing this entry from my dad's computer--a huge-ass machine which consumes half of my small bedroom at our house in California and makes more noise than I do. My parents moved here three years ago while I stayed at college in Illinois, but I come here for breaks.
I never believed in online journals. I keep a journal for myself, religiously, in good old-fashioned notebooks, using a pen or pencil. That's what I believe in--being able to mull over my thoughts and not worry about who my audience is. Some people write so that they can make their personal soap operas public. Then they're surprised when they get in trouble because people read their site whom they did not intend. I don't want to write a soap. But I am feeling attracted to the idea of having a published column, of sorts, to voice my thoughts.
Feel free to comment--communication is good. I don't ever want to be stuck in a bubble.
I am outgoing.
I notice details about things.
I am emotional.
I value seriousness.
I can get really hyper when I'm excited.
I have really good friends.
I love my family.
I get painfully frustrated sometimes.
I am viciously optimistic.
I can be nostalgic and sentimental.
I sometimes say things that probably shouldn't be said outloud.
It has been said that if I were one of those characters from "Beauty and the Beast" that gets turned into a household object, I would be a vacuum cleaner.
I don't undertsand why.
I'm trying to become fluent in French.
I like staying up late at night.
I used to love doing homework and now I can't stand it.
I fall in love with people whom I admire.
I even fall in love with the things I learn.
I've never had a boyfriend or ever kissed anybody.
I don't believe in God, but I see a lot of beauty and wonder in the natural world.

There are some clues that I've put together over the years about who I am. That's all I can tell you because I don't know if even I have a better idea of who I am than that. I'm still trying to figure it out.

I am in flux.

Why keep reading?
.
.
.
Because this is what you'll get: Life is a whirlwind, and we're all in it together.