the jaxon 5

The boys have joined us!

Dad and Noah drove in from California this week. They left Sunday afternoon and got in at 3am Wednesday night.

Having them here in St. Charles makes the house noisier, as we all have to adjust our lifestyle slightly to accomodate the new dynamic and figure out how to move forward in harmony. Already, there have been bumpy spots but also bonding time. Noah and I talked for hours yesterday and set up our laptops with an impromptu wireless network and then bummed around on the internet together in my room until late.

I like having guys around. Life feels more balanced this way.

stories

When you see a car driving down the road all alone in the pitch dark at 1:00am, you know it has a story. Normal people are normally safe in bed at that lonely hour, so anyone who is still out is probably there for an interesting reason. As I was driving down the road all alone in the pitch dark at 1:00am last night, I wasn't thinking in terms of stories until I realized how it must seem from the perspective of someone else. Yes, I had my own story.

After I got out of work that day, Anne and I had met up with Vince and Tim in Aurora and then taken the Metra into Chicago. We had an exciting day walking up and down through the city, getting passport photos taken on a whim when we saw a FedEx/Kinkos, shopping at Banana Republic, eating at Giordanos, and hailing cabs from the side of the street. We had no particular reason to be there except to just be there, and it was fun.

We got back to Aurora late and then spent our last few hours together hanging out in Tim's room. The three of them would soon be setting out for Chautauqua, NY, where they are spending the rest of the summer at a string music camp. But we tried to prolong our goodbyes by putting on a Family Guy episode and then falling asleep together in a pile on the couch. Thus, this was why I was stuck driving home in the middle of the night, but it was a very peaceful drive after a very satisfying day.

Goodbye! I will miss you!

fitting in

I'm here in St. Charles. I moved here for the summer to stay with my family in their new house. There's something about knowing that you're going to be somewhere for an extended period of time that helps you settle in. When I know I'm going to be home only for three weeks, it's long enough that it's not just a break, but short enough that I can't really get settled. This summer has been good so far. I like it here. It's actually so beautiful up here that I get distracted while I'm driving. I wear sunglasses to keep from being blinded by the stunning sights of the open, rolling fields lined with trees, even if the sky is thick with clouds. Most of the time, though, it's sunny and in the 80s. I'm glad to be here. A lot of things are better, not just scenery. It's less stressful and more real. Less stressful, in terms of not having to always rush from class to rehearsal to class like a maniac. More real because now I get to think for myself and make my own decisions.

rain

This morning it is dark and cloudy--it hardly feels like morning.
Rain is pouring down. It's a drenching sort of rain. It's like the humidity decided to just go all out and let everything go at once. As I sit here by the window, I find myself holding back the urge to go out into it. I want to sit in the middle of the street, hugging my knees, and let the rain consume me. Little, inconsequential details hold me back: my clothes would get wet, my mom would look at me funny. Why do those things stop me?